Mitzvah Invitation Basics

Surprising subtleties many times complicate invitations.

In this section we'll take you through "the good, the bad and the ugly" of invitations, with many samples to look at. Look through invitations you've received to see what you like and what the latest fashions in printing invitations are.

At the very minimum, an invitation requires:

• A description of the event (ie, bar mitzvah)
  
• The name of the bar/bat mitzvah
  
• The event(s) the invitee is being invited to
  
• The date of the event(s)
  
• The time of the event(s)
  
• The place of the event(s)
  
• The name of the host(s)

Sounds pretty elementary - but it is surprising at how many people run back to the printer with last minute corrections! And how many invitations do get sent out with mistakes! I repeat this as often as I can. Proofread the invitations several times. Get as many different people as possible to check the invitations, especially if they include Hebrew and English. If your invitation will contain both Hebrew and English, note that if one language is an exact translation of the other, it will not be correct!

Invitations normally come printed on a card which has either:

• one face - this face or page contains all the information required
  
  
• two or more faces - The second page or face normally has the actual invitation. However, the top face usually has an inscription with either an embossed logo, a small sketch and/or a biblical verse with the Bar Mitzvah's name. In other instances, a biblical verse can be used with the bar mitzvah's name highlighted. There is great room for creativity and personalization since the bar/bat mitzvah hosts can highlight the qualities of their child, or the upcoming holiday at the time of the year or some personal issues of great significance to them such as Israel and aliyah.

Language on the invitation is one of the first decisions. Many invitations include Hebrew as well English. This creates several complexities which need to be dealt with. The samples below will take you through various examples so that if you're unfamiliar or insecure with Hebrew invitations, you should find clear guidance on what your choices are and how you should deal with them.

However, there are two issues which need to be first considered in detail:

• Names - In its most simplistic formulation, the recommendation is that names be spelled correctly! Now this may not be as subtle as Einstein's Theory of Relativity, however, spelling names correctly is not as simple as it might seem when dealing with 2 (and possibly 3) languages.
  
  Two simple examples:
  How would you spell Katya in Hebrew?
  How would you spell in English?
  (Chana, Hanna, Hannah, Channah)
  
  When you consider then complications of Yiddish names (try converting Yacha Michla or Genesha Hinda into Hebrew), all I can suggest is that you tread carefully. Check and recheck names with grandparents, aunts and uncles, any documentation you may have, rabbis and historians, etc.

• Dates - Dates have a complication due to the difference between the Jewish and the secular calendars.
  
  The traditional Jewish day starts at sunset and runs to the next sunset whereas the secular calendar runs from midnight to midnight.
  In addition to this discrepancy, modern Hebrew uses the secular calendar with the Hebrew name for the days.
  Let's take an example: Assume you're making a party on a Monday evening at 7:00 PM (19:00) on a day when sunset is 6:00 PM (18:00). In modern Hebrew the day of your party would be Yom Sheni which is Monday by the secular calendar until midnight In traditional Hebrew the day of your party would be Yom Shelishi because it is after sunset but is still Tuesday by the secular calendar Recommendation: make sure that the date on your Hebrew invitation includes in parenthesis the secular date so your guests can determine what day you are actually referring to.
  As an alternative, consider the following sample:
                     
  In order to avert any confusion, this family on their invitation used the secular form for the day ( for Wednesday) but specified the event occurring on the evening before the day of the 5th of Tevet by adding the word prior to the traditional Hebrew calendar date. Use of the word meaning "the evening before the day" is of Talmudic origin relating to the proper time to search for (bread) before the start of the festival of Passover.
  (Note: Jewish tradition has it that Yom Shelishi is the lucky day of the week to get married on since when G-d created the world, He used the expression "ki tov" twice on Yom Shelishi .
  So many traditional Orthodox weddings are scheduled for Tuesdays. The only problem is that when the ceremony is performed after sunset on Tuesday, it is no longer Yom Shelishi .
  In the winter time, these weddings should have been scheduled for Monday evening to benefit from the additional blessing of "ki tov"!)